Only You

Hey to One and All,

It’s way too easy to forget to remember. I get so caught up in looking at the finish line and how far away it is from where I am that I forget to look back and see how far I’ve come. I can get so caught up in comparing my progress with the other runners that I see that I forget that the race isn’t over yet. It’s in those times that it’s easy to beat myself up into a bloody pulp. I get so much practice I’m thinking about turning professional. I know all the right places to punch to take myself to the mat. I know all of the submission holds, the flying kicks, the head locks and choke holds to make me cry uncle, or aunt or any word I want called out. All in the blink of an eye and usually without warning; then it usually takes me a week or so to figure out what I’ve been doing.

Then faintly I hear the Lord say: I don’t like you but I love you; Seems that I’m always thinking of you. Though you treat me badly I love you madly you really got a hold on me.

It may be the Miracles doing the singing but it hits me: I am my beloved’s and he is mine. I may beat myself up. I may treat God badly but that won’t stop him from loving me. He may not like the things I do but he won’t stop loving me. He has been binding my broken heart for over 40 years. He has delivered me from places I didn’t ask to go. And he is delivering me from places I wanted to go but shouldn’t have. He has been disciplining me because he loves me. I have been running a long and treacherous path filled with traps and obstacles and in spite of the little trenches behind me where I have been draging my feet, I have come out on the other side in one piece.

Today I’m grateful for that. I wish I was every day but honestly I’m not. I think the reason is mostly because once you start getting well it’s easy to forget how sick you were. And so today I find myself replying to the Miracles with the Platters: Only you can make this world seem right. Only you can make the darkness bright. Only you and you alone can thrill me like you do and fill my heart with love for only you. Only you can make this change in me for it’s true you are my destiny. When you hold my hand I understand the magic that you do. You’re my dream come true my one and only you.

I wish I could remember that more often than I do.

Still learning how to crawl,

Brad

http://www.cosmoyada.com/