If i had a million dollars

Morning Everyone,

My fingers don't want to touch the keyboard today. There are a myriad of things bouncing around in my head but I don't think they want to come out and play. I was reminded of an old Bare Naked Ladies song as I sat and stared at the keyboard: If I had a million dollars, I buy your love. (But not a real green dress; that's cruel) I'm not sure there's enough money out there for me to buy my own love some days. Don't know how I expect to love anyone else when as Van Morrision oft times mumbles in his muse: I can't stand myself. (down by the pylons).

If you are to love your neighbor as yourself it's a wonder there are still other people on the planet. I'm in this mood because I've been reminded that I've spent my life paying for mistakes. I clicked a button the other day on my website out of shear frustration and repairing the damage that I did cost me a $100. That's a drop in the bucket compared to all that have gone before. I've paid $10,000+ for a 10 second mistake, I've paid $100,000 dollar for a 10 year mistake and I write a check out bigger than my mortgage every month to pay for them.

You'd think I'd have learned by now; and to be honest I have really. A $100 mistake is 1000 times better than $100,000 one and a lot quicker to pay off. But it still puts me in a funk.

Some days I wonder how long? How long til the promises of God start to unfold (I mean the good ones. I see the bad promises unfolding all around me everyday).( Make note: all the promises of God are YES in Christ Jesus even the bad ones). For those of you out there who are still too young to have your choices catch up with you – well they will. If you cannot see that from my life then look at the choices this nation has made and the consequences that you have to live in because of them.

I've been hearing so much about justice the last few days that it makes me sick. Both sides talk as if they know what justice is – as if it were something simple to do or as if it were something that didn't need to be done. The command is to do justice and love mercy. We act as if a bullet in someone's head solves a 10 year problem but we lie to ourselves if we think this is just a ten year problem. This is a 50 or 60 or 100 year problem that began when we began to ignore our own constitution, not to mention true justice. How can you do justice to someone else when the problem was your fault to begin with?

How can a nation that slaughters 2500 of its own people everyday with no remorse whatsoever rejoice that the enemy has been defeated? How can we point a bloody finger at the enemy when we are the enemy? How can a nation who steals from its own citizens to pay for wars abroad, wars on poverty, wars on drugs, wars on ignorance and to pay bureaucrats find any sense of justification in pursuing an enemy that is one tenth as evil? Yes, one tenth as evil.

I know I am probably pissing off both my conservative and my liberal friends as I write these words. But I am just so sick of the charade of both sides. I'm sick of those who just want to get along because in a world of rebellion there is no getting along. I'm sick of those who refuse to look at the true condition of our nation's heart and the blackness that is there -especially in the church.

I hear people say that it is only by the mercy of God that they will make it to heaven but that is not the whole story. If it weren't for justice mercy could never be applied. Jesus was beat to a bloody pulp and hung on a cross to provide the foundation of justice upon which mercy could be built. When you get to heaven you may thank God for the mercy but I bet that elusive million dollars you will be in greater awe that Justice was done so that you could be saved from your own crimes. Love made sure that justice was carried out to the fullest so that mercy could be applied.

I'm tired of people telling half truths about the word of God. I'm tired of people trying to put shiny gloss on the actions of the nation and of the church. It's time to get out of our protective shells of fantasy and live in the real world. In the real world: thirty or so years from now Europe will cease to exist as we know it. It will be Muslim without a single shot being fired or bomb being exploded. In the real world in the next 5 to 10 years Islam will have more followers than Catholicism. In the real world we should be thanking God for the influx of Hispanics into our own country because they are the only thing that will stop us from becoming a Muslim country in the next 30 or 40 years.

I'm not making these things up they come from fertility rates from the various countries. Our genocide is catching up with us. The consequences of our sin (mistakes for the squeemish). The white and black population of our country is decreasing at a rate faster than it takes to maintain a culture. Even if we were to begin to have 4 children apiece it would still take 80 to 100 years to restore what used to be population wise (I'm not sure how long it will take to restore us spiritually because that reproduction rate is much lower at this point than the natural one).

I pay the consequences of my mistakes everyday but that pales in comparison to the price that my grandchildren and my great grandchildren are going to pay. If we want to give them a good gift then it might be wise to teach them Spanish and Arabic -they're going to need it.

How long are we going to only look at the surface? How long are we going to look no further than the end of our noses? Humbling ourselves now may save us but it won't save our culture -I honestly am not sure there is anything worth saving anyway. It certainly won't save the church. Judgment, which is really justice, begins with the house of God. I wonder if it is a coincidence that in the US the majority of the major national disasters have happened in the buckle of the bible belt? (channeling Pat Robertson by accident sorry).


Oops I did it again. When am I going to learn to comfort the people with lies and soft words?

Alabado sea Dios,

Senor Brad